People who send their kids to boarding school should not have children…


Believe it or not, as I was driving to work yesterday the topic of discussion was about the upcoming school year. In the Middle East we follow the American and British school terms so our school year starts in the September and over the next two week the majority of school will be opening their doors and before you know it (17 Fridays) it will be Christmas.. but that is a completely different topic of discussion all together. Schooling in Dubai is and always will be a contentious topic, mainly because it is generally a bun fight to get your kids registered (thankfully according to there are going to be nearly 8 new schools in Dubai alone opening this year) and then comes the fees…. if one had to do a comparison of Dubai school with South African school, school fees in Dubai exceed per year what some families yearly income are. Its a very scary thought, Daniel for example goes to nursery and we pay for it but when he hits FS 1 (Foundations Stage or Grade 0) we are lucky enough that our companies subsidize his school, I must say I’m looking forward to that. His current school fees are around AED 24,000.00 or R67,200.00 a year, that is for three days a week, half day. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining, I’m just stating the facts.

Back to the topic at hand, while discussing the options one has for your children’s education, they started discussion sending your kids to boarding school from Form 6 or Grade 8 and South Africa was mentioned as a great option for sending kids to boarding school because they believe that the private South African boarding schools offer a very high standard of education at a fraction of the cost that one pays in Dubai, UK & US. At this point listeners were in invited to send through their opinions on the conversation and the very first message that comes through was, “People who send their kids to boarding school, should not have had children in the first place.” And immediately I thought to myself, “there is always that one person isn’t there?” Its the same person who said, “Mother’s who send their kids to day care or nursery should not have had children in the first place, because you are neglecting them.”

But it got me thinking as well, I was sent to boarding school from Grade 1 at the age of 6 and while my parental choices may be very different now, my parents didn’t have a choice, I was sent to the nearest good school to where we lived and it just happened to be a 40 minute drive to get there and they had a very good boarding school as well. I, myself, don’t believe in sending my son to boarding school from such a young age but my husband and I agreed from early on that for high school, Daniel going to boarding school would be beneficial to him. Daniel will follow in his Dad and Uncle Simon’s foot steps to go to St. Andrews ( ) in Bloemfontein. We have done our research and just because we want him to benefit from the opportunity to become in independent young man does not mean that we love him any less and thankfully this move is still many years away.

Some parents really do not have a choice in the matter and especially if they are trying to give their children the best education that is possible for them, who gives anyone the right to judge their choices? I believe that sending your children, at an older age will attest to the self-discipline, personal development and independence, which they may not otherwise have developed at home. They quickly learned how to be responsible for their own decisions and how to benefit from this independence. But in the same breathe not all kids are cut out for boarding school but that is a compromise that you as a parent have to choose, you have to know your child very well to make this decision. The life long bonds of friendship that is forged while at boarding school will often will often bolster and enrich their adult lives.

These days boarding school in South Africa is a little bit more lenient, when Julian was at school corporal punishment was still legal in school and wrong doing was dealt with swiftly but that is what was normal during those times. Parents who choose to send their children to boarding school are not doing so because they don’t love their children, they are choosing to provide them with the best educational possibilities that they can and until you have walked a mile in their shoes no one has the right to judge them for that, let alone tell them that they should never have had children in the first place!

9 thoughts on “People who send their kids to boarding school should not have children…

  1. You are way out of my field of experience, being a not well to do girl from Louisiana, I knew no one that went to a boarding school. Also I myself did not have children, When I first read the title I thought you were going to agree. I would imagine that as you say sending a child in high school could well be advantageous in education and in social maturation, but sending a small child does not seem like a good idea to me.


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